


128√e980

by maybeimamuppet



Series: cadnis oneshots so i can get some f*cking sleep [3]
Category: Mean Girls - Richmond/Benjamin/Fey
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Panic Attacks, Post-Canon, cowards, i think this is the softest thing i’ve written so far, let your punks be weak, they have been in all my works but it’s relevant to the plot this time, theyre seniors
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-17
Updated: 2021-03-17
Packaged: 2021-03-26 16:55:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30109119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maybeimamuppet/pseuds/maybeimamuppet
Summary: “This one’s a bonus. Just try it,” Cady begs, passing her the pencil. Janis looks down and sees:128√e980Oh boy. This doesn’t even look similar to what they’ve been doing, she has no idea how to even begin to solve it. Janis is a firm believer that letters do not belong in math, once the alphabet had gotten involved her brain had checked out.(or, the first i love you)
Relationships: Cady Heron & Damian Hubbard, Cady Heron/Janis Sarkisian, Damian Hubbard & Janis Sarkisian
Series: cadnis oneshots so i can get some f*cking sleep [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2207253
Comments: 2
Kudos: 10





	128√e980

**Author's Note:**

> hi, thanks for clicking this. i wanted to put a potential tw for panic attacks. i dunno if that’s necessary, i just wanted to put it in to be safe. 
> 
> enjoy

“Hey, Damian,” Cady calls as she plops her lunch tray onto the table. “Janis isn’t here?” 

“No, I thought she was with you,” Damian replies, taking another bite of his burger. 

“She was in homeroom, did she get sick?” Cady asks, now anxious for her girlfriend. 

“She would’ve told one of us, she always does. We going Janjan hunting?” Damian shoves the rest of his food in his mouth, holding out a hand to help Cady up. She puts what she can into her backpack to eat later and takes his hand with a determined nod.

——-

She wasn’t in their usual bathroom, so Damian leads them through the corridors towards the art rooms. Cady is too busy trying not to worry for her girlfriend to pay much attention to their surroundings, but she does grin a little as she spies one of Janis’ recent paintings hanging on the wall outside the room. 

Damian gestures for her to go in first, so she knocks lightly and pushes the door open. The room is dark other than the sunlight streaming through the window, and silent other than the hum of the air conditioning thrumming through the building. She’s about to turn around to leave when she hears a few quiet sobs come from the easel storage area. 

“Janis?” she calls, wincing as she hears a thump and a quiet “ _ow, shit_ ” come from the same area. They’ve definitely found her, at least. They put their bags down on the counter by the door and head over, working their way through the maze of easels and tables of paint, peeking around one as Damian finally spies the toe of one of Janis’ boots poking out from behind another counter.

“Janis? What are you doing back here, we were waiting for you-“ Damian tries to say, getting cut off by Janis suddenly sobbing much harder. He and Cady lock eyes knowingly as they sink down next to her, she’s having a panic attack.

“Oh, darling, what happened? Can I touch you?” Cady says, suddenly much more worried than she was a few seconds ago. Janis hasn’t had a panic attack in almost six months. She nods quickly, reaching out for a hug. Cady shifts positions and hauls her into her lap with just a bit of effort, rocking them gently as her girlfriend wraps her arms around her neck and sobs brokenly into her shoulder. “What happened, mpendwa? Why are you so upset?” She murmurs, kissing her hair lightly as Damian starts rubbing Janis’ back to help calm her. 

“I-I-“ Janis chokes out, but she’s still crying too hard to speak. She sinks back into Cady’s embrace and cries harder, staining her top with mascara. Cady doesn’t care. She gestures for Damian to grab her backpack as she continues gently shushing her girlfriend, still rocking them slowly. He rushes to grab it and bring it to her, unzipping it so she can root through with one hand to find her small water bottle. She pulls it out and unscrews the lid, gently pulling Janis’ face away from her chest and handing it to her.

“Here, darling, drink some water. Shh, sweetheart, you’re crying so hard. This’ll help a little,” she says lowly, looking to Damian with a concerned grimace as Janis takes little sips from it, hiccuping slightly between them. She takes deep breaths for a second and her sobs slow slightly, but another malicious thought passes through and she’s crying again. “Oh, mpenzi, no,” Cady coos sadly. She suddenly remembers something she read about when she was researching panic attacks and how to help Janis when she got them. 

“Jellybean, can you do something for me?” Janis nods quickly, trying desperately to focus on Cady instead of inside her head. “Can you tell me five things you can see?” 

“Um- um, your eyes. P-pretty. And Damian. And-um,” her eyes dart frantically around the room. “D-desks, and-and your bag, and my-my painting.” She sobs out.

“Good, my girl. Now take a deep breath and tell me four things you can hear,” Cady says softly. 

“Air-air conditioning. And- there’s a bird outside, sounds- sounds pretty. Uh- me. Me c-crying, and um. Um, you t-talking.” 

“Great job, sweetheart. Another deep breath, and tell me three things you can feel.” 

“Uhm- you’re holding me, and D-Damian touching my back, and-and the floor is really hard,” She breathes, calming slightly. 

“You’re doing so good, darling. Now tell me two things you can smell,” Cady comforts, pulling her just a bit closer. Janis told her pressure helps, just like her meltdowns. 

“You-um. Your perfume, I like it-it. And uh. Um. The paint remover stuff,” Janis chokes out, trying to match her breathing. 

“Good job, dearest, you’re almost done. What’s one thing you can taste?” 

“Um. Your water bottle. Like met-metal,” She manages, her sobs gradually slowing to a stop as she goes totally boneless in Cady’s lap. 

“How do you feel, Janjan?” Damian asks, taking hold of her for a second so Cady can get more comfortable before handing her back. It hurts a little, to know he’s not her main source of comfort anymore. But he knows Cady’s good for her, and that the bond he has with her will always be special to both of them. That’s all that really matters.

“Shitty, tired, the usual. My chest hurts,” Janis says quietly, sniffling a little. Damian grabs her some damp paper towels to clean her face with. 

“Can you tell me what happened now, Jellybean?” Cady asks, cradling her carefully. 

“I’m- I’m failing math and science,” Janis mutters, on the verge of tears again. “B-but I need those credits to-to graduate, they said if I can’t get my grades up by the end of the month that I won’t get to walk and I have to make them up in s-summer school.” Janis is supposed to leave for college with Damian in July, summer school means she’d have to withdraw for her first semester. 

“Oh, my bluejay, no wonder you were so upset. But why didn’t you tell me, darling? I can tutor you in math, you know that,” Cady exclaims, kissing her red cheek softly. 

“Yeah, and I can help with science, Janjan, you’re not doing this alone,” Damian adds, rubbing her arm. 

“I-I can’t pay either of you for that right now. And I didn’t want you to think I’m s-stupid,” Janis chokes. Cady hands her the water bottle again, which she takes gratefully. 

“Janis, we would never. We know you better than that,” Damian admonishes. “You’re top of our class in English, you’re nearly acing history, you just need a little boost to get caught up in math and science.” 

Cady pipes up again, adding, “And you don’t have to pay us, Jayjay. You helped me with English last month and didn’t make me pay, remember?” 

“Yeah, I-I just feel like I’d be taking advantage or-or something, I don’t know,” Janis mumbles. 

“You won’t be, Jan. But if it bugs you that much there’s other ways you can pay us,” Damian offers. “Like, for every hour I spend doing science with you, you have to watch one episode of _Drag Race_ with me or something.” 

That gets a weak grin out of Janis. “I can live with that. W-what about you, Caddy?” She asks weakly, seeming almost afraid. 

“There’s that beautiful smile,” Cady chuckles, leaning down to kiss her. “How about... every hour of math, I get half an hour as little spoon and... three really good kisses?” 

Janis flushes scarlet. “I can do that,” she mutters, embarrassed. 

_I love you_ , is what Cady wants to say. 

“Do you want to start tonight? I have a Mathletes competition, you can come watch and then we can work at my house after,” is what she actually says, all of them jumping as the warning bell rings. Janis nods as Cady passes her to Damian again. “Okay. I can’t miss class or I can’t compete, but I’ll come check on you after sixth, okay?” She scoops up her things, hugging Damian and kissing Janis goodbye as she nuzzles further into his hold. 

——-

“The limit does not exist!” Cady yells, slamming her buzzer and securing the win for her team. The boys all cheer and rush up to hug her, Kevin congratulating her on her ‘schquillz’ as he does every competition. She shakes the other teams’ hands before grabbing her water bottle and going to find Janis in the crowd. 

She shrieks as Janis sneaks up behind her, scooping her up and spinning her around before setting her down again. “Janis! You scared me,” she breathes, putting a hand over her heart. “What did you think, sweetheart?” 

_I think I love you_ , Janis wants to say.

“I think you look adorable in your uniform and that you have your work cut out for you because I didn’t understand anything you said,” is what she answers instead, bending down to kiss her. 

“I’m not complaining, the longer we spend working the more snuggles and kisses I get,” Cady laughs. “Let me grab my stuff and then we can go.” She says, pulling Janis down for another kiss before rushing off. 

———

“I’m gonna change really quick, you can put your stuff wherever. I’ll be right back,” Cady says as they enter her bedroom. Janis puts her bag down on the bed, sitting next to it and looking around. She smiles as she spies some of her paintings hanging on the wall, just above Cady’s desk and across from her bed. She picks up the little stuffed lion she bought for her on their first date and holds it close for a minute. 

“I named it Tesoro,” Cady chirps as she comes back, now wearing some cozy shorts and one of Janis’ hoodies. “It’s Italian for darling. Reminds me of you,” She says, getting comfy on her bed and gesturing for Janis to sit on her lap. 

“How many languages do you speak?” Janis asks as she pulls out her textbook and nestles into Cady. 

“Seven, I think. And ASL. I guess that’s eight, actually. Now what are you working on?” She asks, looking over Janis’ shoulder as she flips to the right page. 

“This,” Janis huffs as she points to a problem. “I don’t get any of it.” 

“That’s a factorial, dearest. You  
multiply it,” Cady hums.

“Oh.” Janis says, picking up a pencil and scratching an answer down in her notebook. “Like this?”

“Exactly. See, you got this stuff, you just need a little push,” Cady grins, rewarding her with a soft kiss behind her ear. “Now try this,” she grabs Janis’ pencil and writes down another sample problem for her to solve. 

“Caddy?” 

“Hmm?”

“I can’t read that. Your handwriting is terrible,” Janis laughs. 

“Ugh, I know,” Cady growls, rewriting the problem neater this time. 

They work on that section for a while, until they’re sure Janis has it down pat. Cady gently corrects her if she makes a mistake and cheers her on with little kisses when she gets one right. Janis thinks she likes this system quite a lot. 

Eventually they both get tired, Janis needing a break. She turns around in Cady’s embrace as she lays them both down, resting her head on Cady’s chest and listening to her heartbeat. She gives a contented hum and wriggles closer as Cady starts playing with her hair, twisting her two-toned locks around her fingers and scratching her side shave gently.

They lie like that for a while, lost in peaceful silence with one another. Until Janis’ phone pings with a text from her mom, telling her it’s time to come home. Regretfully, she pulls herself slowly out of Cady’s embrace and starts packing her things back into her bag. 

“No, stay,” Cady whines sleepily, still reaching for her. _I love you._

“I’d love to, but my mom needs me home,” Janis replies, standing and coming to kiss her goodbye. “Thank you for helping me.” _I love you, too._

Janis tucks her in, kissing her sweetly one last time. “See you tomorrow, Peanut.” 

———-

Over the next few weeks, Cady and Damian have tutoring sessions with Janis whenever they’re available, sometimes squeezed in during rehearsals or Mathletes practice. She’s making a lot of progress, but her grades still aren’t where they need to be. 

Right now, she’s sitting next at her desk in her room, cat on her lap and girlfriend sitting next to her. She’s struggling through a new topic, getting progressively more tense as they go on. Cady’s trying her best, but something just isn’t clicking in her brain.

Eventually, nothing Cady’s saying is registering. All she can hear are the thoughts swirling sadistically through her head. _You’re out of time. You’re failing. You’re a failure. You’re never going to get it. Everyone thinks you’re an idiot. They’re all going to leave, this is it. It’s a wonder they haven’t already._ She hasn’t moved for a while, Cady thought she was just thinking until she lets out a choked sob, hot tears dripping onto her paper. 

“Jan? Oh, Bluejay, what’s the matter?” Cady coos, gently removing Pancakes from her lap and pulling her into tight embrace.

“I’m running out of time,” Janis wails into her shoulder. “I’m running out of time and- and I’m not doing well enough, my teachers are- are gonna be mad and everyone’s gonna leave and I’m gonna die alone under a bridge-“ 

“Whoa, darling, what? Where is this coming from, sweetheart? You’ve still got about a week and a half to get your grades up, and you’ve got that test on Friday, that’ll help. I’ll be here all day, every day until you get this stuff if that’s what it takes. And you know damn well I’m not going anywhere, especially not because of something like this,” Cady says sternly but gently, cradling Janis’ cheeks and looking into her watery brown eyes. “You’re the most precious thing in my life.” _I love you._ “You’re absolutely brilliant, my darling, I’m in awe of you every day.” _I love you so much._ “We just need to translate that to this, and that can take some time. You’ll make it out of this, sweetheart. And if you somehow die under a bridge anyway, I’ll be right there with you. Okay?” 

Janis is still a little too emotional to register most of what she says specifically, but she gets the general message. Unfortunately, it sends another flood of emotion through her and she starts sobbing again. With relief this time, but still. 

“Oh, darling, I’m sorry,” Cady mutters frantically. “I didn’t mean to make you cry. Do you want me to sing for you?” 

Janis nods, leaning into Cady’s embrace even further. She pulls her in, adjusting her hold to cradle Janis like a baby, her head resting in the crook of her elbow. She sings an old Kenyan lullaby someone taught her, crooning softly to her in Swahili as she dries the tears from under Janis’ eyes, grinning as she watches her contently and her sobs gradually stop again.

“Thank you, Caddy,” Janis sniffles once she finishes. _I love you_ , she adds in her head.

“Always, mpenzi. Let’s take a break, hm? Have you taken your medicines today?” Janis shakes her head softly, refusing to look her in the eye. “Darling, no wonder you’re having such a hard time. I’m gonna start reminding you to take them in the mornings. Can I leave for a minute to go get them and get us a snack?” Janis clings to her tighter for a second but nods, letting go with another snuffle. Cady kisses her gently, and then disappears to the kitchen. 

Janis rubs her eyes, wincing at the mascara staining her hands as she pulls them away. She grabs a tissue to clean herself up, then looks around for a second. Cady left her Mathletes jacket hanging on the back of her chair, maybe she wouldn’t mind if Janis borrowed it, just for a minute. She picks it up, trudging over to her bed before flopping onto it. Cady is much smaller than her, so there’s no way in hell it’ll fit, but she lays the soft fabric over herself like a blanket. She breathes in Cady’s comforting scent of rosewater perfume and books, fiddling with the end of a sleeve that’s been softened from Cady rubbing it against her lips whenever she’s nervous or trying to focus. 

That’s how Cady finds her when she comes back in, carrying Janis’ prescription bottle and a plate with a massive tower of toaster waffles, Janis’ go-to unhappy times food. “Is that my jacket?” She teases, startling Janis a little. She nods sheepishly before nestling further into it as Cady grabs her water bottle from the desk, handing it to her so she can take her pills. 

“Can I try something?” Cady asks once she’s gotten them down and is munching quietly on one of her waffles. Janis nods, suspicious. “Okay, put the waffle down for a second and don’t ask any questions.” Before Janis can even get a word out, Cady has grabbed her fuzzy pancake shaped blanket and swaddled her so tightly in it that she can barely move. She left her arms out, and hands back her waffle once she’s satisfied with Janis’ impromptu straitjacket. 

“Caddy, what the fuck is this?” Janis asks, not totally complaining. 

“You’re a Jancake! Get it? Like pancake but- but your name? Never mind, what Disney movie do you want to start with?” Cady replies, grabbing her computer and dragging her Janis sushi roll closer as she brings up Disney+. 

“ _Tangled_?” Janis asks sheepishly, sinking further into her cocoon as Cady snuggles up to her.

“ _Tangled_ it is.” 

_I love you so much_ , Cady thinks to herself, watching Janis nibble happily on her snack and dance along as best she can with the opening music.

And they spend the evening like that, feeding each other little bits of waffle and binging sappy movies. Homework can wait, sometimes. 

————-

“You got all these right, Jayjay! I told you you could do it,” Cady cheers at her, setting her paper down and hugging her quickly. She’s down to the wire now, studying for her test tomorrow, her last chance to boost her math grade. Damian had somehow managed to drag her science grade up, so she had that under control now. “Now try this one.” Cady says, carefully scratching down another equation and sliding it in front of her. 

“I thought we finished? That was the last unit,” Janis mutters, confused. 

“This one’s a bonus. Just try it,” Cady begs, passing her the pencil. Janis looks down and sees:

**128√e980**

Oh boy. This doesn’t even look similar to what they’ve been doing, she has no idea how to even begin to solve it. Janis is a firm believer that letters do not belong in math, once the alphabet had gotten involved her brain had checked out. 

“Um...” She hums, tapping her pencil against the desk lightly.

“Do you want a hint?” Cady asks, moving to take the pencil, sliding the page back in front of her once Janis gives a shy nod. Janis is more than a little confused when she simply erases part of it and then moves it back in front of her. Until she looks and sees it now roughly reads:

**i love you**

She snaps her head to look at Cady, blinking at her a few times in shock before throwing her arms around her neck and kissing her passionately. Cady sinks into her, cupping her face with one hand and tangling the other into her hair. Slowly, she crawls into Janis’ lap, straddling her waist and pressing herself impossibly closer.

Eventually, they have to break apart to breathe. “I love you,” Janis gasps the second their lips part. She moves her arms to Cady’s waist, holding her tightly. “I love you so much, I love you.” 

“I love you, too. So much,” Cady responds, pressing their foreheads together and staring into Janis’ brown doe eyes. A wide grin suddenly spreads across her face, Janis’ own matching it to a slightly lesser extent.

“What are you all smiley about?” 

“I said it first. I win,” Cady giggles.

“Hey! I said it out loud first. You cheated,” Janis pouts, smiling again as Cady kisses it away. “We are done for the day for real now, right?” She asks. 

“Mmhmm. You’re gonna ace it tomorrow,” Cady says, nuzzling their noses together. 

“So... you wanna cash in a few of those kisses and cuddle hours I owe you now? I think we both deserve a reward for this,” Janis smirks, laughing a little as Cady nods rapidly. She scoops her up and carries her over to her bed, pulling a blanket over them as Cady presses up against her side and rests her head on her chest. “You wanna sleep over?” 

“Yes please,” Cady hums, crawling more on top of her and wriggling closer. “I love you.” 

“I love you more,” Janis teases, playing with a stray curl. 

Cady leans up and presses their lips together. “I love you most. Now hush,” she mutters, laying back down on her chest. 

“Yes ma’am.” 

——-

“Caddy! Damian! Guys, look!” Janis yells down the hallway, rushing up to them where they’re chatting by their lockers. 

“Whoa, Janjan, you good?” Damian huffs out, catching her as she barrels into him. 

“Yes! Look,” She shoves a slightly crumpled paper at them, Cady peeking over Damian’s arm to see. 

“Your report card?”

“Just look at it, Dame! Come on,” Janis begs, so they do.

_Anatomy & Physiology: B-  
Advanced World History: A-  
Honors English 4: A  
Algebra: B-  
French 4: B+  
Advanced Art & Painting: A_

“Jan, this is incredible! You did it,” Damian cheers, hugging her tightly. 

“Thanks, Damdam.”

“Bluejay, oh my god! I’m so proud of you!” Cady squeals, giving her another tight embrace once Damian lets her go. 

“You seem surprised,” Janis teases. 

“I’m not! I’m just proud of you, loser,” Cady says, pulling her down for a kiss. “You did great, my love.” 

“I couldn’t have without you, baby,” Janis murmurs back, kissing her again softly. 

Damian pretends to gag from behind them. “Ew, too much love!” 

“Aww, you want a kiss too?” Janis teases as she reaches out for him, laughing when he dashes away. She goes back and pulls her redhead close again as the halls clear out for the day. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

_Who would’ve thought math would ever make me so happy?_

**Author's Note:**

> thank you all so much for reading, and for all the comments and kudos on my previous works! gave my monkey brain much serotonin. 
> 
> i’m writing in real time now, so a new work will be put out about once a week, usually on wednesdays. (no i didn’t do that on purpose, yes i am proud of it.)
> 
> please let me know what you thought, any and all feedback is appreciated, but as always please be kind. 
> 
> lots of love, ezzy


End file.
